Women in a Discipling Community

Jesus rocked the religious thought and social structure of His day. He confronted the world not only by His teaching but also by forming a discipling community that exemplified these new kingdom values. Jesus grafted this community into the Israel/Roman society as a means to spread His kingdom as yeast throughout dough. He told His disciples that the world would know that they were His followers by their love for one another, or in other words, by their community. Their love for one another would be counter culture to the world system around them.

This revolutionary community included women. Jesus challenges His society’s view of women by placing women into His community, some of whom had been sick, outcasts, demon possessed, as well as those having social status (Luke 8:1-3). Luke tells us that Jesus even took a group of women along with the Twelve on a ministry tour to towns and villages. Luke is careful to let us know that the women were present in this public kingdom ministry. He also felt it was important to gives us names and background information of some of the women.

The commitment of these women to Jesus is demonstrated by their financial support of Jesus out of their own income (Luke 8:3; Matt 27:55; Mark 15:41) and their courageous faith by accompanying Jesus to the crucifixion (Mark 15:40-41). It was the women disciples who were first to witness the resurrection while the men were in a locked room refusing to believe their report (Luke 24:11).

Christianity is losing her influence on society. Rather than rocking our society, we are the ones being rocked because our ministry structures and programs hinder the community that Jesus intended. Women must play a significant role in our discipling communities if we are to see the same impact as in the first century. It is in the example of kingdom community that Jesus gives us that is a key to the advancement of His kingdom in our day. We are to be a community made up of men, women, poor, rich, ill, sinners and outcast who find unity in Jesus, then we will demonstrate to the world the love of the good news of Jesus.

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Jesus’ Disciples: More Than the Twelve

It may surprise some that the twelve were not the only disciples of Jesus during His earthly ministry. A fresh look at the life of Jesus reveals that He built an extended discipling community in Galilee beyond His twelve men.

Although the gospel writers do not give us a direct description of this community, they do provide indirect references to its existence. Evidence is found here in Luke 6 when Jesus calls together His followers and selects from that larger group the twelve disciples.

“One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God. When morning came, he called his disciples to him and chose twelve of them, whom he also designated apostles: Simon (whom he named Peter), his brother Andrew, James, John, Philip, Bartholomew, Matthew, Thomas, James son of Alphaeus, Simon who was called the Zealot, 16 Judas son of James, and Judas Iscariot, who became a traitor” (Luke 6:12-16).

Although we have no indication of the total number of disciples following Jesus, we do know that it is a group larger than twelve and included women.

Another glimpse of this wider discipling community of Jesus is found in Acts chapter 1. Judas has committed suicide, so the eleven disciples who were left decided to fill the vacancy. The criterion for Judas’ replacement was that he was to have been with Jesus from the beginning of His ministry and to have been a witness of the resurrection. What is fascinating to me is that there was a group of candidates for the position, and the eleven then narrowed it down to two finalists. This tells us that there were more disciples around Jesus during His entire ministry in Galilee that was broader than twelve we think of. Luke writes:

“‘Therefore it is necessary to choose one of the men who have been with us the whole time the Lord Jesus went in and out among us, beginning from John’s baptism to the time when Jesus was taken up from us. For one of these must become a witness with us of his resurrection.’ So they proposed two men: Joseph called Barsabbas (also known as Justus) and Matthias” (Acts 1:21-23).

Some closing observations:

  1. Making disciples occurs on three levels: one-on-one, a small group, and a broader discipling making community.
  2. The optimal environment to make disciples of Jesus is in community.
  3. As a discipler it is OK to have an inner circle with whom you spend more time than with other disciples.
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Hometown Disciple Making

I sometimes wonder if Christians have a misunderstanding of how Jesus lived his daily life. They picture Jesus, a single man, choosing 12 young men and together they go tramping around the Israel countryside for three years sleeping under logs and bridges. For those who have a family, job, and home, an itinerate discipling ministry like Jesus’ is just not feasible. Often, this inability to really understand Jesus’ life becomes a personal justification for not making followers of Jesus.

I believe there is enough evidence from the Bible to conclude that Jesus lived his daily life not too differently from our own. A closer look at the gospels reveals that for most of His life Jesus lived in two towns, Nazareth and Capernaum. We are familiar with His boyhood home of Nazareth, but few realize that Jesus moved his residence to the town of Capernaum to base His new ministry as evidenced in Matthew and Mark:

Leaving Nazareth, he went and lived in Capernaum, which was by the lake in the area of Zebulun and Naphtali.  (Matthew 4:13)

A few days later, when Jesus again entered Capernaum, the people heard that he had come home.  (Mark 2:1)

Although we do not know the hometown of all of the twelve we do know that a few were from or near Capernaum and that all of the disciples were from the same province of Galilee. Mark and Matthew give some clues into the disciples’ origins in these passages:

As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen, “Come, Follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will make you fishers of men.” When he had gone a little farther, he saw James son of Zebedee and his brother John in a boat, preparing their nets. Without delay he called them, and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired men and followed him. They went to Capernaum, and when the Sabbath came Jesus went into the synagogue and began to teach… As soon as they left the synagogue, they went with James and John to the home of Simon and Andrew. Simon’s mother-in-law was in bed with a fever and they told Jesus about her.  (Mark 1:16, 21, 29)

Jesus stepped into a boat, crossed over and came to his own town (Capernaum)… As Jesus went on from there, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector’s booth. “Follow me”, he told him, and Matthew got up and followed.  (Matthew 9:1, 9)

It is important to understand that Jesus did not remove the disciples from their family, friends, neighbors and community to become his followers. In actuality they were made followers of Jesus in the midst of the community in which they lived. An example of this is Jesus having dinner with tax collects, sinners, and His disciples in Matthew’s house in Capernaum (Matthew 9:10)!

To further support this view I propose a look at the life of Peter. We know from Mark that Peter was married while a disciple of Jesus (Mark 1:29). I seriously doubt that Peter put his marriage aside for 30 months in order to trek around Israel to follow Jesus.

I recommend an evaluation of our ministry methods based on a rereading of the life of Jesus. Jesus was a real person, who lived in a real time and in a real place who came on earth to demonstrate for us how to make disciples in the context of our family, friends, and our hometown.

Here are a couple of closing observations:

  1. Jesus did provide a model that everyone (dads, moms, and singles) can emulate today.
  2. We need to re-read the ministry of Jesus through a hometown based discipling ministry.
  3. There is significance in the geographical location in which the Holy Spirit places me to make followers of Jesus.
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Making Disciples is About Friendship

I do not believe it is possible to separate friendship from making followers of Jesus. My disciples are my friends. How one makes disciples is by the laying down of his life for his disciples, whether they be his own children or an individual the Lord brings across his path. This process requires time, diligence, commitment, sacrifice, and true love for another person. It doesn’t just “happen.”

Friendship is not the design of man but a truth that flows from the love nature of God. Throughout history God has extended His friendship to man. Abraham was called a friend of God (2 Chron 20:7-8, Isaiah 41:8, James 2:23-24) and the Lord would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks with his friend (Exodus 33:11).

When Jesus came to earth as the God-Man we are eyewitnesses to God demonstrating friendship. In addition to Jesus’ friendship with Lazarus, sinners and outcasts, and in various other stories, the gospels give us an extensive account of Jesus’ friendship with His disciples. During His last meal with the disciples there is a moving scene when Jesus calls them His friends. He goes on that night explaining friendship to them saying, “Greater love has no one than this that he lay down his life for his friends” (John 15). Then, the next day His disciples experienced that ultimate demonstration of friendship through Jesus giving up His life for them.

Part of the discipling process is to experience the love of having someone lay down his or her life for you. Taylor Gardner is the man who discipled me. Although I appreciate all that he taught me, what changed my life were the sacrifices he made for me by spending hours with me and creating opportunities of ministry for me often at his expense. One example was the number of times Taylor would have me teach a group of people, knowing he could have done a better job. These opportunities provided the experience I needed to develop my gifts and abilities.

I am often asked, “Where do I being in making disciples of Jesus?” My answer is by being a friend. I do not announce to someone, “I am discipling you!” Rather I simply show an interest in their life, seek to find where God is at work in that life, and join in the adventure.

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Discipling Community Is To Empower One Another

How rare it is within Christianity to have someone personally encourage you to take your next step of faith.  I will never cease to be amazed at the number of bright young leaders I meet who have never been affirmed by an older believer.   Recently I was introduced to a sharp young pastor serving in his first church.  He has grown up in church and graduated from a Christian college, yet he has never had an older leader affirm his leadership gifts and talents.

Jesus taught that love is to lay down my life for another.  To follow Jesus is to lay down my life for my fellow followers by empowering them to take their next step in fulfilling the Lord’s purpose for their life.  Ray and Kelly Siler are part of our group in Chicago and are moving to Portland next month to make disciples.  Earlier this year our community helped them with an exploratory trip to the west coast.  The group connected them with our contacts in the northwest (parents, pastors, and friends) to help them with housing and research in preparation for their move.  We also put together a prayer card and prayer letter to have others join us in praying for this transition.  Voluntarily members gave money to help with moving expenses.  We wanted Ray and Kelly to be sure they knew we fully support them in this important transition.

The opportune time to encourage others is in their transitions.  Transitions are significant because they are the moving of God in the life of His child to fulfill His purpose.  Because transitions are central to the life of a disciple so it should be important to me when I see the Lord guiding a brother or sister into a transition.  In a real discipling community it is the responsibility of each member to join God in what He is doing in lives of others in the group.   I am to serve others in their transitions just as I would like others to be there for me in my transitions. 

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Anyone Can Make Disciples!

In the movie Ratatouille Chef Gusteau believed that “anyone can cook!” I believe Jesus would say “anyone can make disciples!”

For the sake of the advancement of the kingdom of God, it is essential to insure multiplication on the most basic level. The primary level of disciple making is the family. It is in the home that each father and mother is responsible to disciple their own children. However, Christianity has relegated disciple making to the professional clergy and church staff. Although the church would insist that the parents are responsible for the spiritual life of their children, it contradicts this teaching by:

  1. Not discipling the mother or father,
  2. Not instructing parents on how to disciple their children,
  3. And, having children and youth ministries which do not include the parents.

Our multiplying approach in Chicago is to train each child of God to make other disciples of Jesus. My prayer is that this multiplication will begin in the home of each man and woman in our community as they disciple their own sons and daughters. Once a person is able to make disciples, then the Holy Spirit can place him anywhere in the world, and he will not only make disciples but also form these disciples into churches.

One can only imagine the expansion of the kingdom of God if our children were not only discipled by their parents but also trained to make disciples of others.

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Disciple: Endangered Word or Extinct Ministry Model?

Our language betrays us. It is interesting to me how much of the language we use as the children of God is not used in the Bible and what language the Bible does use, we do not. As much as I would like to think of myself as a Biblical thinker, the words I use sometimes reflect a different set of ideals.

Luke, as an historian, gives us an account of the first 30 years of what he called “The Way”. It seems to me that he would use words that reflected the language and thinking of the first century followers of Jesus. One example of the disparity between our language and that of Luke is seen in the book of Acts, what we would call a “Christian” Luke calls a “disciple”. Here are some examples:

  • In Damascus there was a disciple named Ananias. The Lord called to him in a vision, “Ananias!”  (Acts 9:10)
  • When he came to Jerusalem, he tried to join the disciples, but they were all afraid of him, not believing that he really was a disciple.  (Acts 9:26)
  • In Joppa there was a disciple named Tabitha (which, when translated, is Dorcas), who was always doing good and helping the poor.  (Acts 9:36)
  • He came to Derbe and then to Lystra, where a disciple named Timothy lived, whose mother was a Jewess and a believer, but whose father was a Greek.  (Acts 16:1)

Think about how foreign it would be to our ears to hear someone say, “There is a disciple in St. Louis I would like for you to meet” or “I am having coffee today with a new disciple”. Never does Luke refer to a individual follower of Jesus as a “Christian”.

When referring to larger groups Luke’s word of preference is “disciples”. Luke uses “disciples” 26 times in contrast to what we would call “Christians” and the term “believers” he uses 11 times. He does say in Acts 11:26 that the disciples were called “Christians” first at Antioch, but Luke never refers to disciples as Christians. Below are a couple examples of Luke’s usage of the word “disciples”:

They preached the good news in that city and won a large number of disciples. Then they returned to Lystra, Iconium and Antioch, strengthening the disciples and encouraging them to remain true to the faith.  (Acts 14:21-22)

We landed at Tyre, where our ship was to unload its cargo. Finding the disciples there, we stayed with them seven days. Through the Spirit they urged Paul not to go on to Jerusalem. But when our time was up, we left and continued on our way. All the disciples and their wives and children accompanied us out of the city, and there on the beach we knelt to pray.  (Acts 21:3-5)

A mystery is why Paul never uses the word “disciple” and only uses the word “disciples” one time in Acts 20:30, “Even from your own number men will arise and distort the truth in order to draw away disciples after them.” The word “disciple” or “disciples” never appears in any of Paul’s writings even though the book of Acts was written after Paul’s writings.

Paul uses the word “believer” only 4 times in his writings and “believers” 9 times. We have no record of Paul ever using the term “Christian”.

A couple possible explanations have been suggested:

  1. Paul wrote in letters. Letters are understood when placed into the context of a larger story. A letter written by me to my mother would have little meaning to someone who is not familiar with our family story. Luke provides the backdrop of the larger story through the book of Acts and Paul’s letters then fit into that story.
  2. Paul uses the language of making disciples in his writings. (See Oct 3rd, 2007 Post, “Paul Church Planter or Ardent Disciple Maker?”). Although Paul might not use the word “disciple” or “disciples” in his writings he does use the language of disciple making. For instance, Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.”  (1 Corinthians 11:1)

The question before us is this:

  • Are we not making disciples because the word “disciple” has been removed from our vocabulary or have we removed the word “disciple” from our usage because it does not fit our present ministry methodology?

Whatever the answer, we need to get back to both a Biblical model and Biblical language fulfilling the great commission of Jesus.

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Paul Church Planter or Ardent Disciple Maker?

Although we tend to view Paul as a church planting missionary, I believe Paul continued the disciple making model of ministry as Jesus demonstrated.

The writings of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John give four camera angles of Jesus and his relationship with the twelve disciples. At the end of their time together Jesus instructs his men to make followers of him, just as he had done with them. William Shenk observes:

. . . Every clue Jesus gave his disciples as to their own missionary vocation suggests that this is the authoritative model for them as well. Jesus left no general guidelines, formulas, or methods for his disciples to follow-only a demanding model. [1]

Evidence that Paul that was a disciple maker:

  1. Paul asked others to follow him as he followed Jesus.

Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.  (1 Corinthians 11:1)

You know how we lived among you for your sake. You became imitators of us and of the Lord; in spite of severe suffering, you welcomed the message with the joy given by the Holy Spirit. And so you became a model to all the believers in Macedonia and Achaia. The Lord’s message rang out from you not only in Macedonia and Achaia-your faith in God has become know everywhere.  (1 Thessalonians 1:5&6)

Therefore I urge you to imitate me. For this reason I am sending to you Timothy, my son whom I love, who if faithful in the Lord. He will remind you of my way of life in Christ Jesus, which agrees with what I teach everywhere in every church.  (1 Cor 4:16-17)

Join with others in following my example, brothers, and take note of those who live according to the pattern we gave you.  (Phil 3:17-18)

  1. Paul had disciples.

But his (Paul) followers took him by night and lowered him in a basket through an opening in the wall.  (Acts 9:25)

A few men became followers of Paul and believed. Among them was Dionysius, a member of the Areopagus, also a woman named Damaris, and a number of others.  (Acts 17:34-18:1)

  1. Paul sacrifices his life in order that others could find spiritual life. Paul follows the example and teachings of Jesus in being willing to suffer, believing that one’s death will result in making disciples of Jesus.

For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. 6 If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer.  (2 Cor 1:5-6)

For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body. So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.  (2 Cor 4:11-12)

We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us.  (1 Thess 2:8-9)


[1] Wilbert R. Shenk, The Culture of Modernity as a Missionary Challenge, The Church Between Gospel and Culture (Grand Rapids: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., 1996), 77.

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Being the Conduit of Jesus’ Love to Your Disciple

The apostle Paul was an affectionate, enthusiastic, optimistic cheerleader for his disciples.  He understood that every son and daughter has been created by God for an eternal purpose. As a discipler I seek to join the Holy Spirit to find and fulfill that purpose for my disciple. No matter how dire the circumstances in a person’s life, I must never lose confidence in the hope that God is at work in that individual and that Jesus will carry it on to completion.

  1. Learn to say “I love you” to your disciple.
    • Paul openly and enthusiastically expressed his pleasure for others. “We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us.” (1 Thessalonians 2:8) I have spent many hours being trained on how to share the gospel with others, but never was I taught how to share my life and love with others.
    • In the discipling relationship it is important to tell your disciple that you love him. I remember a disciple telling me years later that I was the first adult who had ever told him that I loved him and how it served as a reference point for the rest of his life.
  2. Discover ways to communicate to your disciple their value to you.
    • Paul gave value to people. One would walk away from Paul’s presence with a sense of purpose and significance. Paul unashamedly expresses his joy and gratitude for the disciples at Thessalonica: “For what is our hope, our joy, or the crown in which we will glory in the presence of our Lord Jesus when he comes? Is it not you? Indeed, you are our glory and joy.”  (1 Thessalonians 2:19-20)
    • I have never had any Christian leader express to me that I was their “glory or joy.” Nor has anyone come to me and expressed their gratitude to God for me as Paul did to his disciples: “How can we thank God enough for you in return for all the joy we have in the presence of our God because of you?”  (1 Thessalonians 3:9)

After reading this passage I could not get on the phone fast enough to express my love and gratitude to those people I had discipled over the years. Paul gave me permission to be extravagant in my love for my disciples.

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Curriculum for Making Disciples

The most common question I am asked about making disciples is “what curriculum do you use?”

Rather than following a curriculum, I team with the disciple to unearth the ways of God throughout his/her life. Each believer’s relationship with their Heavenly Father is unique, unlike any other child’s-past, present or future. The Lord personalizes the relationship by placing a distinguishing spiritual birthmark on each child through suffering.

Smasher was my brother’s English bulldog. Bulldogs do or don’t do whatever they like. Smasher did not like swallowing pills. It was an exercise in futility to try and get pills into his locked jaws. In making disciples I have wasted time and energy trying to convince people to swallow spiritual truths prematurely. Suffering is the instrument of God to open up a disciple’s heart to learn the ways, truth and nature of God.

Sufferings in the life of my disciple are the signposts of where and how the Holy Spirit is making that disciple into a follower of Jesus. My responsibility is to guide my disciple to view all the circumstances of his/her past through the lens of the sovereignty of God and His purposes.

The suffering in one’s life is the evidence of God’s work from childhood through adulthood. As I get to know my disciple I am looking for the points of suffering throughout their entire life. These then serve as markers which when connected provides a picture (or life-map) of God’s eternal purpose for that disciple’s life.